Self Love is defined as regard for ones own well-being and happiness (chiefly considered as desirable rather than narcissistic. But I like the urban dictionary meaning better, it says to unconditionally spoil yourself, value yourself and accept your self-worth. Putting yourself first so you can grow externally and internally for YOU. Its a value that shows and symbolizes how much you appreciate and accept who you are regardless of your situation.
I have come to a conclusion that most of the time the reason why a lot of people can’t deal with their problems, emotions, hurt and pain, life’s challenges, is because they don’t love themselves as they ought to, actually they don't know how to love themselves.
A lack of self love, can make it hard for people to retract from a challenging situation.
It usually becomes difficult for them to learn from their experience, to heal, to grow, to get pass obstacles. So they hide behind stuff like drugs, mental health(not the type of mental health that is associated with a break down of certain brain function), emotional unavailability, excuses, laziness, anger, fear, all kinds of sexual misconduct, but to mention a few.
One of life’s constant is change sometimes it’s very painful, it’s mind boggling, it’s depressing, stressful, hard and other times it’s pure joy but it is inevitable as long as there is life, it will always wear it’s many ugly faces no matter who or where you are. It’s also known as a phase, because it passes with time, deliberate time. This means if you are going through a difficult phase and you don’t make an effort, you could stay there forever. An experience could mar you forever if you don’t revamp your mindset about it, or if you continue to hold on to it. You are the only one that can write and re-write your story, the choice you make is all up to you.
It is never wrong to experience negative emotions when you are going through a challenging phase, however way you choose to deal with a difficult phase is actually the right way but the wrong way is, when you decide to dwell on it, making it linger, carrying it on to every facet of your life, depriving yourself from happiness, not being able to receive love from others, not being able to function as you ought to, that means you don't love yourself enough to fight.
If you love yourself right, you will pull yourself from ANY situation with the right attitude and mindset. I am not saying it is easy, but it is possible. Think of any difficult situation in life today, when you think of how much you love yourself, how you want to enjoy what you have, how you impact other people, just generally how relevant you can be...you will overcome.
If you were given a couple days to live, how would you want your last moment to be like, joyful or sad? Because, at the end of the day, your life is not just about you, it’s also about other people involved in your life, and other people who's lives you may impact.
I am very passionate about motivating people to do better, about people's mental health, and in my little way this is how I want to help people who are stuck and can't find their way back to loving themselves. I have been there too many times and I know for a fact that you can do it, if it will help I will share some personal experience in due time.
It’s okay to be sad, depressed, to be troubled, afraid...but it’s not okay to remain there. So before you pop that pill, smoke that joint, stick to booze, become emotionally unavailable, become to afraid, become angry all the time, go into a never ending state of depression, too anxious, display self destructive ways......remember its just a phase, it will pass, learn what you can from it. Love yourself enough not to destroy yourself, enough to stay away from unhealthy connections, enough to talk to someone to strengthen you if you have to, just love yourself. I am yet to see a person who destroys what they love.
Don’t give up! Keep hope alive, stay positive and true to yourself. Don’t forget that you are worthy.
